robotskirt

I am a traveler. My mission: to drive through galaxies in search of life forms never before seen. My only nemesis: the Duchess of Hazard who transmits her distraction devices through such things as free cable and bathtubs of unusual sizes. When I finally submit my findings I will be sent home. Until then I will enjoy every alter universe I stumble upon and with them all the chicken rings and santana covers they have to offer. bye-bye. rs

Monday, January 09, 2006

get your kicks in 2006!

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My friends have informed me that because a new calendar year has been instated it was mandatory for me to come up with some things that I will promise to do differently in the next 365 days. I will keep a running list to document my progress.
1) Get a trainer: status complete-see attached hyperlink
2) Stop and smell the flowers - IN PROGRESS bought some haven't stopped yet
3) REVISED: TAKE allergy medication - I forgot I'm not on any
4) More pillow fights
5) Get a k9 sidekick - In progress - My baby's momma is a bitch, she had her on 1/1
6) Help Fish-Face get through the hard times
7) Convert all my Run DMC casette tapes to mp3
8) Stop crying
9) Eat a chicken kiev - consumed yesternight w/ broccoli and a noodle dish
10) Stop making people cry
11) Catch up on my Jonathan Winters telecourses - In progress sent away for it
12) Find my inner child and ground her for 2 weeks - tried, she went limp & escaped
13) Take more naps
14) Take less naps when I should be doing something else
15) Get a sub-pump for my subconscience
16) Finish the book I've been scanning for 6 months
17) Recode the DaVinci Code
18) Get my hair styled like Mr. Pantsuit suggested
19) Uncode the DaVinci Code
20) Get some fresh air
21) Find Underpants and Pancho and ask why they haven't written

4 Comments:

  • At 5:12 AM, Blogger saragibson8466 said…

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  • At 10:01 AM, Blogger OneEar said…

    Regarding obtaining a K9, perhaps you would consider adopting Mookie the Leaker.

    http://www.golden-rescue.com/mookie.htm

     
  • At 1:38 PM, Blogger robotskirt said…

    get your skis shined up
    grab a stick of juicy fruit
    the taste is gonna move ya
    take a sniff
    pull it ou---t
    the taste is gonna move ya
    when you pop it in your mou---th
    juicy fruit
    is gonna move ya
    it's so soft
    it'll get right to ya.
    juicy fruit
    the taste
    the taste
    the taste
    is gonna moo-ove ya.

    er something...
    my database is a little foggy on this one. We had to recite this poem for an earth science class. I got straight C+s which is why I am stationed here as opposed to Mars. All the "over achievers" were sent to Mars. A couple of my comrades were just sent to Pluto. I was stuck in a shuttle for 9 years once...it wasn't pretty. The cockpit smelled of burnt popcorn and sulfer. Gross. Alas, Pluto is supposed to be nice this time of year. (sigh)

    rs

     
  • At 1:58 PM, Blogger robotskirt said…

    There is a bot who shares the same mother board as me...she has a K9 sidekick that suffers from the Mookie Leak.

    She went to a store that sells sporting goods equipment and bought him something called a child's jock strap. She applied a woman's feminine napkin to the inside and POOF! problem solved.

    Granted it was a horrible site to behold but at least there were no more drippings on door mat!

    I will write a letter to Mookie and tell him that as long as he has no pride there is hope! Maguiver inspired contraptions such as this have been degrading human pets for years!

    I feel an overwhelming sense of purpose now. Thank you OneEar!

    Be sure to grab on to his paws with both hands and use much vocal inflection as you tell Mr. Mookie: don't you know, things will change, things will go your way if you hold on for one more day. Things will go your way. If you hold on.

    (sniff, sob)

    rs

     

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